What do you say to someone who is hurting?
Most of us hate to see the people we care about in pain. We want badly to say or do something that will take the hurt away. Many times there is simply nothing we can say but we can just be there.
Sometimes all we can do is sit with them.
Being there.
I read the story of Job this week and we know that everything he had was taken from him. The interesting thing to notice is how long his friends sat with Job in silence.
While Job’s friends are criticized for their later poor treatment of his troubles, at first they simply sat with him. They sat with him for seven days and seven nights without saying a word to him, because they saw how much he was suffering.
This shows us that when someone we love is hurting, it’s our presence that often matters most. Their example reminds us that even though we may not always know what to say, simply sitting with someone in their suffering may be the best thing we can do for them.
Silence makes us uncomfortable, so we may try to fill that void with words thinking there is some magical thing we can say to give comfort. But in times of great suffering, words alone are often inadequate to express the comfort or help that the hurting person truly needs.
I have been guilty of feeling compelled to say something. I think I have learned that people don’t need our words - they just need us. They need our shoulder, a hug or bring them a meal.
It’s difficult when our loved one is hurting but just simply be there. No Bible verse, no Christian cliche or comparing situations. Be the anchor that helps them get through the storm in their life.
