Second Chance Marriage

"God hates divorce."

That’s the verse in the Bible that people like to quote when addressing divorce.

Yes, God does hate divorce but He does not hate divorced people.

I grew up in a church that strictly taught that if a person got a divorce that they could not remarry until their ex-spouse died.

I’m sure there were a lot of divorced people praying for their exes to die.

If you ask 10 Christians about divorce and remarriage, you will likely get 10 different views on it.

I have been divorced and remarried.  I caused the divorce.  I’m not proud of that but I also know that I wasn’t a good husband.  No, I didn’t have a string of affairs but I wasn’t the kind of husband I should have been.  

I will not go into the details but I want to say that you can’t judge this issue point blank unless you have experienced it yourself.

The first advice is to get counseling.  We did and I did. Sometimes there is just no other option.

God forgives.  That’s all I can tell you.

I know people who were directly opposed to divorce until divorce affected them or their family.

Some like to refer to the Apostle Paul and his advice on marriage when there is no evidence that he was even married.  

In John 8, Jesus was asked about a woman who was caught in the act of adultery.  The law at the time was to stone her.  They asked Jesus what He thought about it.  He didn’t engage in a theological debate or argue the law, He simply asked anyone who was without sin to throw the first stone at her.  When they had left, He told the woman to go and sin no more.

When Jesus encountered the woman at the well in John 4, when He asked about her husband she actually had five husbands.  He did not tell her to go back to the first one or leave the fifth one.  He changed her life right there and she became a new person with a new outlook on life.

I find it disappointing that so many believers want to cast stones at me and others who have divorced and remarried. Some like to brag about the number of years they have been married but there isn’t a trophy for that accomplishment and it doesn’t help if you are miserable and living everyday wishing you could die.  

Yep, that’s where I was once.  

I have heard some say, “You’re still married to your ex in God’s eyes” but God ain’t blind.  He sees completely and more clearly that others do.  Just because you remarry doesn’t mean you are “living in adultery”.  It is not a continuous sin.  That’s the church I came from.  It was about law and not much grace.  Jesus forgives.  Period.  None of us are perfect and every marriage isn’t perfect.  Our first option shouldn’t be divorce but if we do, we must honor our second chances.

I’m sure my former church thinks that I have “backslidden” or have left God. I haven’t.  I left the church but I haven’t left God.  Since my divorce, I have spent more time with God than I ever did before.  

I am happier now and I am a better husband.  I often say that I have a second chance to be a better husband.  I’m not perfect but I definitely have a happier life.

So for those of you in a perfect first marriage, I am happy for you but please don’t cast stones at those who didn’t get it right or have made mistakes. 

The Blackberry is Back....

The Blackberry is back….sort of.

I remember when I got my first Blackberry. I loved it! It had an actual physical keyboard.

The newer smartphones eventually made the Blackberry obsolete, evolving to onscreen keyboards.

Clicks Technology has gone retro with their Click Keys attachment which can turn an iPhone back into a Blackberry again with physical keys.

I almost pulled the trigger to purchase one of these for my iPhone 15 Pro Max for $159. I’m a sucker for new gadgets but after watching the reviews on YouTube, I decided to hold onto my money.

The main issue with this new Clicks attachment is that it adds length to the phone which is something that I really don’t need. For me, it would make my phone very top-heavy. It’s already stressing my hands to type on my phone without this attachment.

One of the main sells for Clicks is that it will give you more real estate on your display. Honestly, I have become accustomed to what I have now. If I have a need for a physical keyboard or more real estate, I just use one of my external keyboards.

Some of the pros for using Clicks:

• Slide your iPhone into Clicks to unlock the benefits of buttons for creating on-the-move.
• Clicks opens up screen space for apps and content like chats, browsing the web, engaging on social and creating on the go.
• Keyboard shortcuts and dedicated keys cut down on swipes and steps, giving you ultimate control of your phone.
• Real buttons make typing so natural you don’t need to wait to get back to your computer to write that long note, edit the document or get your ideas out.

So, this attachment MAY be something you want if you absolutely miss a physical “Blackberry-like” keyboard for your phone. Honestly, I think most of us have adapted to life without this and don’t need another accessory to add size to our phones.

For more information: https://www.clicks.tech/

Seasons of Our Lives

In the last month, our family has welcomed two new additions. The newborns have entered the first season of their lives. I can only imagine what the world will look like through their eyes and the experiences they will have in their future.

Life is like the seasons in nature. It changes. Sometimes the changes happen too fast and sometimes not fast enough.

There are times that I am not sure if I was ready for the season that I was in. Right now I am 60. That age doesn’t seem real to me but here I am. Fortunately I am still in good health. I don’t know what to expect in this season in my life but I hope that I can adjust to whatever I will face.

I think about how priorities change with each season of life. What was so important when I was younger isn’t important now. In this season of my life, I am thinking of keeping my blood pressure under control, financial security and just finishing well. I’m no longer chasing “the dream” or trying to pursue a career.

The Bible tells me that God is the same. (Hebrews 13:8) That’s always a comforting thought. He’s with us in every season of our lives. More than anything else, that gives me security. God doesn’t toss us to the side when we get old like the world does.

The changes in our lives as we pass from season to season are a part of our journey. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 reminds us that there is a time for every season and purpose for everything. During the different seasons, we can trust God for strength and guidance as we navigate through them. He promises in Isaiah 41:10 to “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God.” Faith during these times helps us to grow and trust in God’s plan for our lives.

Whatever season you are in, try to adjust to it and make the most of your opportunities in that season.