Where is God when we are in pain?

There is one thing in life that can humble us all.

Pain. 

I have recently started having pain in my knee.  Usually it only bothers me when I am going down certain stairs.  A few days ago my wife and I were watching a show and shortly into it I started feeling intense pain in that same knee.  I could not stand up or straighten my leg. I even wondered at one point how much pain I could take.  It was bad.  

I don’t like being me on days when I am in pain.  It’s not the Milton you want me to be. 

Pain is our great equalizer. It’s part of being human. 

I can’t imagine those who have to endure chronic pain every day.  It definitely puts someone in a negative mindset as they are constantly striving for the fleeting moments without pain.  

I could give you a lot of God-things about dealing with pain but I will admit that I don’t handle pain very well.  I get moody and withdrawn. I just want the pain to end.  I will take aspirin or whatever I can get that will take away the pain.  

Yes, I trust God and I absolutely believe He can heal but do you want to know a secret that I hate to admit?  Too many times when I am in pain, I don’t even think to pray about my pain or ask God to heal me.  I don’t know why.  

I will change that by asking Him a lot more.  If not, I will just ask Him to help me to endure the pain.  

I don’t like pain.  It hurts and it makes me feel weak.  

I know God cares about our pain but it sure is difficult when we are hurting.  

We all face pain in some way.  It isn’t something we can avoid.  I know there are some preachers who will allege that the reason we are not healed from pain is due to a lack of faith but that simply isn’t Biblical.  We can still have faith but understand that His strength will help us in our pain.  Somehow we have to find our way through it and manage it.  

Lost in a Crowd

Since moving to New York, it is no surprise to discover that there are a LOT of people here.  It is easy to get lost in the crowds.  There are different people, different languages and people going into every direction here.

The world's current population is over 8 billion people.  That's a lot of people out in the world.

As we were out this weekend, I wondered how it is possible that God can know me personally out of billions of people?  I don't understand it.  How does God keep track of everyone?  How is it possible that He even cares about what I do?  Honestly, in the grand scheme of things, I'm not important nor do I stand out in the crowd to even be noticed.  

But, God DOES know us individually.  Did you know that God knows us in some much detail that He actually knows each number of our hair?  (Luke 12:7) 

How is this even possible?  How can we even begin to explain God?  If we could, then WE would be God. 

God's ability to know us personally can only be explained that God is not human.  He created humans in His image but He is all-powerful, all-knowing and present everywhere at the same time.  Since He created us, He knows how we work and how we think.  There is no way that we can be able to comprehend how He does it.  

It's nice to know that God knows us.  We are not lost in a crowd.  He knows everyone in the crowd and even our very thoughts (which is a bit scary right?).  

The following passage in Psalm 139:1-16 gives us a good description of how well God knows us:

God, investigate my life;
get all the facts firsthand.
I’m an open book to you;
even from a distance, you know what I’m thinking.
You know when I leave and when I get back;
I’m never out of your sight.
You know everything I’m going to say
before I start the first sentence.
I look behind me and you’re there,
then up ahead and you’re there, too—
your reassuring presence, coming and going.
This is too much, too wonderful—
I can’t take it all in!
Is there anyplace I can go to avoid your Spirit?
to be out of your sight?
If I climb to the sky, you’re there!
If I go underground, you’re there!
If I flew on morning’s wings
to the far western horizon,
You’d find me in a minute—
you’re already there waiting!
Then I said to myself, “Oh, he even sees me in the dark!
At night I’m immersed in the light!”
It’s a fact: darkness isn’t dark to you;
night and day, darkness and light, they’re all the same to you.
Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I’d even lived one day.

I feel a lot better now in knowing that God actually does know me and cares about me even in a world of billions.

Man With The Plan

I can’t help myself.

I am the person that NEEDS a plan. I am ALWAYS planning ahead.

If someone mentions going somewhere, I’m already thinking about the route to take, what time we need to leave and parking situation at the destination.

It’s a curse.

At times it overwhelms me.

I am the one with the folder and the spreadsheet. My family even pokes fun at me and my folder.

Yes, I’m that person.

Even back in high school, I remember going to an amusement park and I was the one who had the watch and the park map. My classmates wanted me around because they knew I would be the one who would know when and where we needed to be.

They were having fun and I was thinking ahead to where we needed to be next.

I often wonder what it would be like to have a day when I leave the planning to someone else so I could enjoy myself. It’s a nice thought if I could let go. Somehow I end up taking it over.

I don’t know why I am like this. Maybe it was my strict upbringing, eight years in the military or 30 years in the legal system. I am comfortable with structure. I rarely know how to function without a plan.

There is nothing wrong with being a planner but I probably take it to the extreme. I can’t help it. That’s who I am.

Yet another joy of being me.

It’s tiring constantly being the one in charge, the one everyone relies on, the one who always has to have everything under control. It’s the pressure to make sure everyone is happy, to ensure that every detail is perfect, and to avoid any potential disasters. We often feel like we have to be “on” all the time. We can’t afford to relax, to let go, or to admit that we’re feeling overwhelmed.

We’re afraid that if we don’t take charge, things will fall apart.

I wish I could give my mind a break.

Even now I am thinking about what I am going to have for breakfast in the morning.